Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you. Carl Gustav Jung
It is easier to fight for principles than to live up to them. Alfred Adler
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Brendan Gill
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercouse, yet he has left it out of his heaven. Mark Twain
A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted. Helen Rowland
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. Mae West
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. Oscar Wilde
My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife, you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates
He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough. Lao Tsu
A rich man's joke is always funny. Proverb
Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river. Cordel Hull
When one burns one's bridges, what a very nice fire it makes. Dylan Thomas
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. Winston Churchill
Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance. William Shakespeare
A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies. Oscar Wilde
There are three faithful friends¡ªan old wife, an old dog, and ready money. Benjamin Franklin
To cease smoking is the easiest thing. I ought to know. I've done it a thousand times. Mark Twain
A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking. Arthur Block
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. Albert Einstein
What is a committee? A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary. Richard Harkness
Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. Benito Mussolini
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate
it. Franklin P. Jones
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should
have been more specific. -- Jane Wagner
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. Oscar Wilde
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because
I hate plants. A. Whitney Brown
Experience is that marvellous thing that enables you recognise a mistake when you make it again. F. P. Jones
"Sure, everyone always said 'Socrates what is the meaning of life?' or
'Socrates how can I find happiness?', did anyone ever say 'Socrates
hemlock is poison.'???????" Socrates right before his death
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we
didn't. Erica Jong
The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is
generally employed only by small children and large nations. David Friedman
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new
discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...' Isaac Asimov
- Re: funny quotationsposted on 09/26/2004
"My formula for greatness in a human being is amor fati: that one wants nothing to be different, not forward, not backward, not in all eternity. Not merely bear what is necessary, still less conceal it¡ªall idealism is mendaciousness in the face of what is necessary¡ªbut love it."
--Friedrich Nietzsche - Re: funny quotationsposted on 09/26/2004
"Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand."
Baruch Spinoza - Re: funny quotationsposted on 09/29/2004
Some people walk in the rain, others just get wet. -- Roger Miller - Re: funny quotationsposted on 04/07/2008
ti - posted on 04/07/2008
Add few Mae West quotes, I always think that Woody Allen is Mae in a man's suit :-)
I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.
Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
When women go wrong, men go right after them.
It's not the men in my life that counts--it's the life in my men.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
I speak two languages, Body and English.
A woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.
I've been in more laps than a napkin. - Re: funny quotationsposted on 04/07/2008
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. Albert Einstein
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